Let’s Get Started

Women often carry the emotional, mental and physical weight of others. We often find it difficult to rest without guilt. All that tension, responsibility, guilt, and “not enoughness” sits in our body, heavy. Today, we give ourselves permission to take up more space, to breathe more deeply, and to find inner peace. We start with one simple mindful PMR exercise. 

There’s no perfect way to do this. Simply follow along with the script and notice what your body has to say. Once you’ve practiced a few times, I invite you to make this PMR script your own! Follow your gut and listen to your intuition. 

Getting Started

Find a safe, comfortable place. Remember, there is no perfection here. Just trusting yourself and what you need. Sit, stand, lay down. Have you eyes open or shut. Once you’ve practiced this you might feel comfortable doing it on the train, at work, wherever you like. 

Breathe. 

Remind yourself: This 10 minutes is mine. I am allowed these 10 minutes. I am allowed rest. 

Face & Jaw

Clench your jaw. Furrow your brows. Tense your head and face. Hold that tension. Notice all the effort this takes. Next, breathe out as your soften your expression. Soften your brow. Soften your gaze. Move your tongue from the top of your mouth to rest in the bottom jaw. Open your mouth wide and stretch your face muscles out. Notice how easy that feels. Lighter. Your expression is your own - not anyone else’s. You don’t have to smile to appease others. You are allowed to soften, or harden, as you choose. 

Shoulders

Lift your shoulders upwards, towards your ears.  Feel them tense as if you are carrying the weight of the world. Squeeze. Hold. Then drop them down and breath out, slowly. Notice how it feels to drop that weight. As you breathe you know that all that weight should never have been your responsibility. Your shoulders in your body are yours. You get to decide what they carry. These shoulders are yours. They are for standing tall and unapologetic. 

Chest & Breath

Take the deepest breath in. Hold it. Tense your chest muscles. Notice how it feels to hold that breath in. Notice how your chest expands. Feel the power in your lungs and your beating heart. You are power full. Then breathe out as you release and relax those muscles. As your breathe out slowly, remember that you are enough. You are alive, and you are enough. 

Hands & Arms

Curl your fingers into fists. Notice the power in your fingers, and your fists, and your wrists. Notice the pressure. Hold that for a moment. Feel your strength. All that power in your fists. Notice the tension and the power surge up your forearms and biceps. Hold. Exhale, and release by opening your palms slowly. Imagine, in that movement, of letting go of the pressure to always be ‘on’ and always be holding things together. Feel the lightness in your hands as you let that pressure go. Your hands are open and free. Ready for creating, for holding boundaries and for receiving what you need.

Stomach

Tense your core and stomach. Notice how that feels, as you draw your stomach inwards. Hold that. Hold it. Then release, and breathe. Let your stomach soften and enlarge. There’s no need to suck in or be self-conscious. You have a belly. Women have bellies. That belly holds breath and nourishment. Be gentle with it, and kind to yourself. 

Pelvis & Hips

As we move down to our pelvis and hips, notice the strength these muscle areas hold. Tense, and feel that strength as you hold it. Many women hold tension in these areas, without noticing. As you release, breathe out. Breathe out and release all that shame associated with these areas. Notice the spaciousness in that breath. Our pelvis is strong and foundational. This body is yours, and yours alone.

Legs & Feet & Toes

Notice your attention travel downwards to your thighs. Tense your thigh muscles. Release. Tense. Release. Move down to your calves: tense, and release. Your legs are strong. They are powerful like you. They are unshakeable. Feel your feet where they meet the floor, grounded. Curl your toes up tight, and uncurl them slowly. Notice how that feels. Think of all the women who came before you, who used their feet to walk their paths so you can now walk yours. These strong legs and grounded feet are yours, and you get to choose where they take you. 

Closing 

To close, take three deep breaths in, and three slow breaths out. Take a moment to notice the parts of your body now. What feels different? 

Say out loud (or inside) to yourself:

This strong body is mine.
I don’t have to shrink myself.
I give my body and my Self permission to rest.
I give my body and my Self permission to take up space.
I am allowed to take care of me. 
I do not have to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. 
I invite my Self to make more time for me. 

When ready, gently open your eyes or come back to your surrounds. Orient yourself to your surrounds by noticing what colours and shapes you see around you. Return to your day, but carry with you this reminder that empowerment exists with you, strength lives in you, and rest is not selfish. 



A Note on PMR Practice

As with other coping tools and stress reduction techniques, practice is key! Doing this PMR might feel odd at first. The more we practice something, the better we get at it, and the better we respond to it. Changing our mindsets, responses, and moods can take time. BEHAVIOURAL change helps us get there faster than we otherwise would. So, give this PMR a go and keep practicing. Notice how you feel before and after you do it, and if you notice anything significant the more often you practice it.